I've realised something.
My first real attempt at world building was Broken Falcon, a love story in essence- set in a world where the Bad guys had already won.
Wayward is my upcoming story, one I plan to devote myself to entirely- a demonstration of everything my self discovery in art has taught me and a story I hope will mean something. It's got a spirit of adventure and a warm heart but it deals with ugly emotions and a quest driven by guilt. Above all else- in its darkest moments it is never incapable of shining a light. Because there is always hope.
Broken Falcon by contrast, was an angst filled tragedy about two lovers torn apart by a war, a hero fallen from grace and a life barely worth living. I was a teenager at the time, wouldn't you know. It was a story I kept adding to for years, a story I kept intending to tell eventually. As such, it changed over time and without noticing it- so was I.
When I began to evolve Wayward from idea to story I realised I had a lot of shelved Broken Falcon lore I was probably never going to explore, so I reworked much of into Wayward- as you can see up top; a Young Zepher(Broken Falcons main character)depicted as a warrior of winds- an idea that would later become the foundation to the characters in Wayward.
It's only very recently that I realised how much I have changed as a person. See, I was toying with doing a Five-page Broken Falcon short comic for FREE COMIC BOOK DAY and started to think about what might make an interesting glimpse into that world ten years on.
I drew up a lot of very crude doodles of Zepher as an old man, an example of his race in their Prime. I was interested in the idea of him being an exiled relic of a by-gone age and so I started to think about the lore that remained and how I could give such a short glimpse into that world and still make it interesting.
As it turns out- I not sure it's ever going to be that interesting.
I had a sudden moment of realising I'm not the same person I was, I no longer have a desire to share such a grim and bleak vision of a world. I'm not sure if this is a reflection of me- of some shift in ideals or perspective- I'm certainly not adverse to enjoying stories with similar themes. It was an odd moment for me.
I find the character compelling but perhaps him being the centre of the story is a mistake- it's hard to relate to a character that vile and bitter. I didn't see any way to reinvent him without distancing the story and the character from each other.
These very quick doodles were some of the exploration I had taken into entertaining a new Broken Falcon story before I realised the issue(I was happy I finally found a way to work White into his design, was a long standing goal for me.)
I feel like I've learnt something about myself now, that maybe it's time to focus on what I truly believe in and not entertain anything I do not. In the struggle to become better it's easy to over-think things or stop yourself from taking the scary steps. I think I can shelve Broken Falcon for good now though, there may come a time when things click into place- or I find myself wanting to explore those darker themes again but for now, the character remains a pillar of my journey so far- a friend who helped me a long the way and whose wisdom is still guiding me all these years later. Now unto brighter, more hopeful places.